Parenting needs a guide book

No body ever said parenting was easy, or does it come with an instruction manual. The last two weeks Tyler has been acting out, not really sure why or where this is coming from or even how to handle it. I know I have made my fair of mistakes growing up and didn't always do everything I was suppose to or listen when I needed to listen. I'm sure all these mistakes his making are all apart of learning and growing and being a boy. Boys are so different then girls. I grew up with only sisters and the only boys I knew where my cousins, but at age 10 we had moved so after that they only one's I knew were from school or my friends siblings or my sister's boy friends. I believe my exact words when finding out Tyler was a boy where "what on earth do you do with a boy" 2 sister's and 4 niece's later he was our very first male on my side of the family. Wouldn't change it for the world. In fact I love having my boys they are the greatest gift ever. They both have their moment's but for the most part they love their mommy and they each need their mommy time with me.

But why has he always been so difficult with following rules, I swear every year I have to deal with this. He's not listening or following play ground rules. Mike and I both feel that we should as a team discipline him for bad behavior but when is enough enough?? It seems like we can take aways everything, TV, DSi, Wii, Bike, skateboards..... and still he will return to school and misbehave. I always find it odd that when at home he always seems to be so good. I hardly see this misbehaving side. Even as a very little guy in daycare or at preschool I was always hearing about how Tyler wasn't following rules or bothering other little kids or a note being sent home about what rule he broke that day. It's hard not only on us as parents but on us as a family. I feel like Tyler being in trouble ruins things for us at home. No TV mean's there is NO TV for all of us, not wanting rewarding for bad behavior but his there a line so the rest of us dont have to suffer. If I send him to his room, he will just sleep then he wont be sleepy when its bed time.

So after a few days of battling my head and my heart I have come to the conclusion that maybe taking EVERYTHING from Ty isn't the best way to handle this whole situation. I feel that taking so much all at once will make it hard for him to want to earn everything back. Almost like its unreachable goal, then theres a part of me feels that maybe Tyler's aggressions come from deep inside. Maybe from the emptiness we all have from not having Mikie in our lives. Some how I have always thought this was a big part of Tyler's emotions and actions. Even though I cant prove it I feel like this has a huge part of who he is today. So how do I fix this little kid that I love?? I start everyday a new day, a fresh start to make the mistakes we did yesterday and fix them, learn from them and making them better today. I always remind him it's a day to start over and that we love him. Today was a little different I have decided that I would un ground him from everything. It's not only a new day for him but for us as parents as well. We all need to take a step back and look at this big picture as a whole. I have to remember that he's only 8 years old. He's regained everything back, but his skateboard. :( that's not longer an option, but he will be able to make it so he can earn a new one for his birthday or Christmas. I didn't really agree with the whole skateboarding thing, but by the time I got home it was already in pieces. Hopefully Tyler will remember though and know that he isn't allowed to break other people's belongings and that isn't not a good feeling when someone breaks your stuff or hurts you.

I just want to be this amazing parent, with these amazing children that are successful in life. I want my boys to have the knowledge to know right from wrong and good vs bad. I pray everyday that this two boy's are bonded together for life and nothing can tear them apart. Not family, money, distance, etc.... Family is family and it shouldn't matter your mistakes, you love regardless and unconditionally. As tomorrow starts a new week I can only pray I give Tyler the proper guidance to make decisions and choice that he knows are right.